Valentine's Day

So Tony and I wanted to go to a nice restaurant for V-day but neither of us got reservations in time so of course they were booked. So instead we ended up going to IHOP and a movie. I had one more request. If he went with me to Babies R Us to look at cribs, then I wouldn't make him register with me when the time came. That would be torture for him. So he agreed and we looked around and got an idea. I was very proud of him, he didn't freak out about the prices too much and he gave his honest opinion about stuff. We had fun making fun of some of the stuff people think they need and some of these toys are crazy. Too much stimulus for those babies but whatever.

Heartburn

Last night I woke up to a terrible pain in my chest. I can only assume it was heartburn. I've had it before a few times but never this bad. It only happens when I'm asleep too, which I think is kinda weird but what do I know. I also have this occasional pain in my stomach, it's a shooting pain but just happens randomly so I'm not freaking out too much about it. Hopefully all my fears will be put to rest on Thursday when we go to hear the heartbeat again. Can't wait to hear it.

7-10 weeks pics

I guess I've grown a wee bit in the past 3 weeks. There's a slight difference. Mostly at the top under my boobs. Don't know if that is bloat or everything getting pushed up. I've noticed that it isn't as comfortable sitting and resting my arms on my stomach anymore. That annoys me, I don't know where to put my arms now. I'm getting very uncomfortable already. I think it's mostly because of my back and neck injuries and all my ligaments are relaxing making it hurt worse. I can't even imagine how my body will feel in the coming weeks if it is this uncomfortable now. Hopefully I will get some energy soon so I can exercise a bit and get some strength back.

Off subject

When you know someone is going to die and you have time to process it, it is almost worse than if you just woke up one day and found out they died. There is a thought process to both ways but I think maybe the sudden loss is better. The shock of it almost takes away some of the pain and sadness. You don't have as much time to think about everything. What could I , should I or would I do. Maybe I'm just more emotional because I'm pregnant. Dying sucks either way.

Cop a feel

I have been feeling myself up everyday lately. My symptoms seem to be starting to fade and that is kinda freaking me out. I dont' get to hear the baby for 2 more weeks so the only thing I have to go on is my symptoms. Hence, why I am feeling my boobs all the time. I just caught myself doing it at work and laughed at myself. Just making sure they still hurt at least a little gives me reassurance. so Iw ill continue to cop a feel whenever I want.

I have been sleeping like a baby lately too. Except when I have to go to the bathroom. I wish I could sleep like this when I wasn't pregnant. Peeing 10x a days is not letting up but once again, it's a symptom so I'm fine with it.

I just can't wait to hear it again. 2 weeks is dragging on. We do get to go to a prenatal class next Wednesday. Hopefully that will be fun and we can learn some stuff too.

First OB appt

Went to my first OB appt yesterday. Took some blood and urine and got an exam. I think I could have seen it again but I stupidly told her that I just had an ultrasound on Friday, so she said we could use that at dating the pregnancy. So now I won't get to see it again for 3 more weeks. Ugh! the days are dragging on. I'm so ready to be out of the first trimester so I don't have to worry so much. I know anything can happen at any time but I will just feel so much better once I see it again and can move into the next trimester and tell everybody.

So far, being pregnant is not very fun. The only fun thing is realizing that I am pregnant and see it on the ultrasounds. Everyone says it will get better and I hope they are right. My back is killing me now.

New Bras

So I had to buy new bras already. Had to move up to the 38C. I would have taken a 40C but I couldn't find any. I just like to breathe and my 38B is not cutting it anymore. It seems early to move up in size already but in my family, that's the first thing to get huge. At least I can breathe today.

Seeing is believing

We got to see the baby again today. I am measuring at 8 weeks today and everything looks great. The heartbeat was 165, which the Dr. said was strong and the baby pretty much doubled in size. It was neat to see how much bigger it was than last time.

I still feel sick every day and my boobs are getting huge. At least to my standards.

We decided to tell more of our family today. I also told the Marketing and HR dept at work. That was nerve racking but it's done. Not sure how or when we will tell the rest of the world. We'll see.

Baby keep on growing beautiful, strong, and healthy.

Blah!

So morning, afternoon and night sickness has set in. Mostly afternoon and night sickness. Haven't gotten sick yet just nauseaus all day. I have to talk myself into eating and what I'm gonna eat. Today my mantra was, I like chicken, I like chicken, as I made myself eat my lunch. Chicken is grossing me out lately but I love it, or at least I used to. I don't know what else to eat. I tried a cheeseburger yesterday which seemed to go down okay. The ginger ale seems to be working but the crackers don't cut it. Peanut butter seems to help too. I miss liking food and I'm only 7.5 weeks in. Hopefully I'll got off easy and this will be the worst of it.

What To Expect...

I bought the book What To Expect When You're Expecting yesterday. Goodness,that is a scary book. I want to be informed but some of that stuff maybe you should just find out as you go. I made the mistake of skipping some chapters and going right to the labor and delivery chapters. Big mistake, as if my stomach wasn't feeling upset enough, that almost made me hurl. I had to put it down and stop thinking about it. I read up until the 3 month, so I don't think I'm gonna read anymore until I'm there. No need to skip ahead anymore.

Aversions

Better pics of our blueberry.

So, for the past 2 nights I've had some sort of chicken for dinner. Chicken with mushroom rice and then fired chicken from KFC. Both times I had to push the chicken aside and just eat the rice or mashed potatoes on my plate. My stomach is not having any of the chicken. Everyone knows that I'm a chicken girl. I eat it almost every day. What the heck am I gonna do if I can't eat chicken for the next 7.5 months? I love chicken, it's my go to meal. I hope it's just a 2 day faze or something. Nothing tastes the same anymore.

Positive thought: At least I'm not throwing up yet.

First picture

Blurry picture of our baby. The size of a blueberry. I am measuring 6 weeks and 3 days. We originally thought I was 7 weeks 1 day but he said I probably ovulated late. We heard the heartbeat and saw it flicker on the screen. Even Tony thought that was cool. I feel so much better now that we know it's in there growing and it has a strong heartbeat. I go back in about 10 days to get another ultrasound and then he will release me to my OB/GYN if everything looks good. So far so good though. Now we can breathe a sigh of relief but we've still got a long way to go. My new due date is September 5.

Told the family

So we told the family last Wednesday. I had gone out to look at wedding stuff with Karrie, my mom and Kristi earlier that day and it was so hard not to tell them, but Tony wanted the parents to find out at the same time. So we all went out to dinner and Carol and mom were talking about Karrie's wedding plans and I busted in saying: Karrie wants to have her wedding in July or August, and Carol is just shaking her head yes, yes, then I said, well that will be unfortunate for me bacause I will be about 7.5 months pregnant at that time. Carol was still shaking her head in agreement and she finally realized what I said and she screamed a little bit and my mom screamed a little bit and said really? I said yes and she squeezed the life and crying out of me. Everyone was in skock obviously since we were supposed to be on a break and we pretty much had no faith that we could do it on our own. Mike shook Tony's hand and Tony acted like the butthead he said he was gonna be. But I knew he was gonna act like a dork so I didn't care.

Then we went and told Kristi, Tony and Kylee. I asked Kristi if we could come over and give Kylee a belated Christmas gift. When we got there, I told Kylee we had one more gift for her and she was all excited. Then I told her that the gift isn't here yet and wouldn't be here for another 7.5 months. Kristi realized what I was talking about and about jumped for joy but I asked Kylee if she knew what would take 7.5 months to get here. She said no, and I said well do you know what takes 9 months to get here? Adn she got this big grin and said A BABY? And I said yes, and she jumped up and gave me a big hug.

I told my dad that night too and I got the response I prety much expected...I said happy new year and he said, yeah, it's been great so far. Then I said I'm pregnant and he said congratulations and then we pretty much hung up. Whatever. I did my duty and told him, I'm done going out of my way to tell him stuff. Not gonna stress over it.

Tony has gotten much better at accepting the reality of all this. We are both still in shock and a little bit of we will believe it when we see it. That will be on Tuesday, so it's getting closer.

I haven't really felt too bad so far. My boobs are killing me and I'm going to the bathroom much more now. I'm a little more tired but not that bad. No morning sickness yet, but it's still early. I've felt a little queasy but nothing bad at all.

Confirmed!

Beta is 2526 which is very pregnant from what the nurse said. Don't even have to go back for another test because it's so high. Go back in 2 weeks to check things out. I am 5 weeks and 1 day pregnant. Thank you God. Please keep us safe.

HOLY GOODNESS!!!

This morning I peed on a stick and it came up positive! I have no idea how we did this. I'm on day 37 on my cycle, so I decided today is the day to test. This is officially the longest cycle I have ever had so I took the test and it had a +yes on it! I am in disbelief. I went to the doctor to get the blood test done and now I'm waiting on the results. I might have to wait until tomorrow to get them, so I bought more tests just so I can see it again. God, please don't let this be a mistake, let this be the real thing. I really don't know how we did this on our own. We've been trying for almost 2 years and nothing and when we take a break, this happens. I just don't know what to say. Please let it be real.

5

Since I haven't really been thinking about baby stuff for the past month or 2, I forgot how many IUI's we did. Well, we've done 5. 4 with the drugs and 1 without any drugs. So I guess I can really feel like we tried everything for that protocol. Definitely time to move onward and upward. One more month off and then it's time for more shots. :-)

Feeling much better for the past week. Now I can start looking forward to all the baby stuff again in the next week or two. Gotta set up a uterine biopsy to make sure I don't have anything wrong in that area. Maybe I want something to be wrong so we can fix it and make a baby. I don't know. I just want a baby.

My body

Well, I am infection free but still not sure what the heck is going on in my body. It is just doing what it wants to do, whenever it wants to do it. I just hope it is on some sort of schedule and normal by the new year so we can start trying for a baby again in January.

Money

I was looking at the IVF papers yesterday and when I first read them, I thought it was gonna cost us $32,000 to do this. But at 2nd glance, it seems it will only cost about $19,000. Gee, how wonderful. It's still a crap load of money but a lot less than I thought. I just hope a miracle happens and we don't have to go that route. Trying not to think about it too much until next year so I can get better and be ready for whatever we have to do.

Negative...in a good way

Well, I'm finally neagtive for the c diff. After 2 rounds of Flagyl and a month of wanting to crawl into hole I am feeling a little better. But my body is still not back on track yet so I am once again on another medication to try to nip this thing in the bud. If I'm not back to normal by next week, I have to get a colonoscopy the day before Thanksgiving. Fun times. I'm just praying really hard that I respond to the drugs and get better by next week. I'm really so over this. The weight loss is nice, 6 lbs, but not worth the agony I have been going through the past month and a half. I just want to be normal again. I guess it's good I don't have to worry about making babies at the moment. My plate is full right now.