Tuesday, December 28, 2010
He is getting such a personality. He flirts with his eyes and smiles all the time. He tries to mimick our sounds and he loves for us to make any goofy noise with our tongue or make stupid faces at him. He is laughing a lot now. He is such a happy baby. I don't know what we did to deserve such a good baby. I just hope he stays that way and isn't a terror when he gets older. Only time will tell so I'm enjoying this for as long as it lasts. Now, I just wish he would go to bed at a decent time and let me sleep through the night. Wishful thinking at this point.
Monday, December 27, 2010
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
I'm so so tired I didn't even make any paragraphs out of this.
Thursday, December 16, 2010
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Thursday, December 9, 2010
Monday, December 6, 2010
- Looking at his little hands in wonder in front of his face.
- He can grasp a rattle.
- He found his feet but doesn't care much about them yet.
- He likes to hear himself talk and coo.
- He is laughing all the time now.
- He can stand up from a reclined position (by holding on to my fingers)
- His neck muscles are getting very strong.
- He's got good kicking skills
- He is sticking his tongue out at us.
- He can find me across the room.
- He knows our voices, he gets excited hearing us talk to him over the phone.
- He rolls from side to side but not all the way over yet.
- He can poop through a diaper like it's no ones business.
Thursday, December 2, 2010
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Overall, it was a very long and hard day for me and I guess I will never know how it really was for him. I just don't want to lose the bond that we've created over the past 3 months. I'm sad. Everyone says it gets better, but we will see. Day 2 isn't much better so far but at least I got more sleep last night.
Sunday, November 21, 2010
He had his first Thanksgiving at G&G Ricciardo's yesterday. He was such a good boy for everyone. I can't wait to see how he is at Christmas with all the lights and stuff.
Thursday, November 11, 2010
Monday, November 8, 2010
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Monday, October 4, 2010
I met with a lactation consultant today. She said wathced me feed him and she weighed him to see how much milk he is getting. She said he is getting a good amount and latching on well. She jsut said I need to feed him more often if I want to get my supply up to be able to breast feed when I go to work in 2 months. The schedule they want you to keep is crazy, I think I would have a meltdown if I did it. So I'm gonna do my best do what I can and see how it goes.
Sunday, October 3, 2010
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Thursday, September 23, 2010
This has a been a very trying week. Jaxson had his 2 week check up on Monday. We get there and they ask the normal questions for a physical, then they take him to be weighed. Last time we were there was when he was 5 days old and he weighed must have weighed about 7 lbs. He had lost some extra weight after being born which is normal. So when they weighed him on Monday he only weighed 7 lbs 3 ozs. The doctor started freaking out about how he hadn't gained enough of his weight back yet. He said we had to make sure nothing was wrong so he sent us for more tests, which meant more heel pricks for our baby. We had lots of questions for the doctor but he kinda rushed us tothe hospital. So they took 3 vials of blood and they asked us to wait 15 min to make sure it was a good draw. Sure enough, the nurse comes out and says they have to do it again because the draw was bad. I had already been crying since being in the dr. office and having to get him stuck again just killed me. So, we did the draw again and finally it was good to test. We got the test back later that day and of course they were fine. I never thought anything was wrong with him, I was just exhausted and sad for him.
So we get a call from the doctor and he says we had to supplement formula every 4 hours. So we had to feed him every 2 hours for the next 3 days. Luckily the grandparents and my sister were able to help out and let us sleep for a bit or we would have been wiped out. He said if Jaxson didn't gain weight by today, then he would have to put him in the hospital. Long story short, after a long and very tiring week, Jaxson gain 6 ozs. So now he weighs 7 lbs 9 ozs. We still have to feed him more often but we can start to extend it now and I don't have to give him formula unless I need to. We have to go back again for a weight check next Thursday just to make sure whatever we are doing is still working.
We think the problem was that I was breastfeeding him incorrectly. I was feeding him for 10 minutes on each breast instead of letting him finish one whole side so he could get the fatty milk that comes at the end of the session. Basically I was giving him skim milk. I was justfollowing what I was told from the hospital. They tell you so many things when you are on drugs and out of it, so maybe they told me something different but I don't know. It's all so confusing.
Friday, September 17, 2010
Monday, September 13, 2010
- He cries like a girl, which is so cute. But then again, maybe all babies cry like girls at first.
- He will occassionally purr when nursing.
- He has Tony's eyes.
- He is a trooper. Got stuck inthe heel 3x last week for jaundice and barely cried.
- He is stubborn like his mom and dad.
- He likes to sleep on his side.
- He has big hands and feet.
- He likes the right boob, doesn't care for the left. I find this strange and frustrating.
- He also like to play for a few minutes before breastfeeding, I'm told this is called Mouthing.
- He is such a sweet boy.
- He can already hold his pacifier in his mouth.
- He loves his daddy and mommy.
- He likes to go outside and look at the sky.
- He likes to be swaddled but also fights to get his hands out during the night.
- He has an angel kiss above his right eye.
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
The c-section wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. I thought it would hurt but it didn't. I'm glad they didn't tell me when they were going to start opening me up because it would have made it worse. Tony stayed behind the curtain with me and before we even knew they began, we heard this crazy loud scream coming from Mr. Jaxson. Tony stood up and saw them pulling him out of me. He said it was really neat. He got to watch them sew my uterus upwhile it was on my chest. Jaxson just screamed the whole time even after they took him out of the room. They laid him on my chest and I met my boy. He was so cute and small. Tony looked so proud and happy in the pictures we took. The doctor said once he got in there, my uterus was swelling so the c-section was the only way to get him out safetly and he was glad we decided to do it. That made me feel much better about it.
They had to take me to recovery for a couple of hours. My epidural was making me shake so bad that I thought I was gonna shatter my teeth. They had to give me 4 shots of demerol to get it to stop. Tony took the baby to show everyone while I was in there.
We had lots of visitors throughout the weekend. We went home on Monday, September 6. Everything is pretty much a blur at the moment. I'm still trying to remember as much as I can.
Thursday, September 2, 2010
Overall, I've enjoyed parts of being pregnant and I've loathed parts of being pregnant. Would I do it again in the future? Probably maybe. At least next time I will have an idea of what I'm in for. I've enjoyed the kicks and wiggles and loathed the devil that is acid reflux.
We are excited and scared to welcome you into our world tomorrow. I hope we can be the best parents that we can be. We will love you and protect you with eveything we have. See you soon.
Please watch over us and keep us all safe and healthy. I know I'm asking a lot but please make tomorrow as pain free and stress free as possible and give us strength and courage to get through the long day. And thanks for blessing us with this little miracle baby.
Monday, August 30, 2010
I'll start with the bad so I can end on a good note.
- Taking 2 years to finally happen
- Migraines & back pain
- Not knowing if I could carry to term because of previous issues
- The loneliness of it all sometimes
- Aversion to chicken for 4 months
- Acid Reflux is the devil
- Hormonal breakdowns
- Pain in my hands and feet from swelling
- Restless nights
- Peeing 5x a night
- Just being uncomfortable in my own body/ Feeling useless to help with anything physical
- Not knowing if everything is gonna be okay until he is finally here
- Finally getting pregnant after 2 long years of trying
- Seeing that little bean on the screen for the first time
- Feeling the pop, pop, pops for the first time
- Seeing a little human being inside me on screen for the first time
- Feeling him kick and roll
- Getting a little more attention than normal
- People being nicer to me
- Seeing Tony and myself transform through out this process
- Giving the gift of a new great grandson, grandson, niece, cousin and nephew to my family
- Seeing how excited everyone is about his arrival
- Seeing the 3D pics and seeing the possible traits of mine and Tony's in him
- Creating something that will connect Tony and I forever
- The antcipation of it all
- Becoming a mama
I'm sure there are more things on both sides but that's it for now.
Tony finally got the garage so we can park both cars in it but I still don't think I want to park in there. The carseat base is in the car. The room is ready...enough. The business is up to date. The bags are packed. And I'm ready to get this show on the road. Tony is fine if it doesn't happen until Friday but I'm ready now. I guess it's all up to baby at this point. I hate waiting.
Thursday, August 26, 2010
First, we were talking about how much weight I'd gained and that I didn't think I'd gain much more before the baby comes and she says: I don't think you COULD get much wider Aunt Kim. We all just looked at her and busted out laughing. She didn't realize she had just insulted me by basically calling me a wide load. She's lucky I have a good sense of humor.
Later that day, we were riding in the car, listening to the radio and I was using my "in front of other people singing voice" and she says: I feel sorry for this baby when it comes time to sing him to sleep. I said why? And she said: Because Uncle Tony can't carry a tune and you sing all weird on purpose. How is he every gonna fall asleep with that?
I said: We can always hum. :-)
I guess the problem is that I'm somewhat jealous that she got to meet and experience Kylee and my other cousin's babies and she isn't around to see mine. I know she won't see Denise's new baby but it's not the same. This is my first and possibly only baby. She got to meet everyone else's first and second. Maybe it's selfish of me to think this way but it has been bugging me throughout this pregnancy for some reason. One thing that makes it okay I guess is the thought that maybe she just needed to hand deliver the message to God that Kim and Tony need a baby. After trying for 2 years with nothing happening, I was about to throw in the towel. But considering the fact that the month after she died, I got pregnant, I just like to think she wentup there and told God it was time for this to happen. I know she is watching all this happen from up there but it would have been nice for her to see it in person. Anyway, that's my random thought for the week. I'm just ready to have this baby now.
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
He says I'm still about 2cm dilated but I'm 80% effaced, which I guess that's how soft my cervix is. Other than that, I was having a few little contractions today and I told him the baby isn't moving as much so he put me on the NST machine again. Everything looked great, the heartrate is still in the140s.
Friday will officially be my last day at work, if I make it that long. So glad to have to end dates now. One for work and one for the pregnancy. I will only be pregnant 9 more days at the most. AMEN! I hope I make it to this weekend.
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
I weighed the same as last week 172. So I'm still at 26 pounds total so far. He said my dizzy spells and blurred vision are probably because I need to eat more or better. My hands still hurt alot everyday. Yesterday I could barely hold a pen in my left hand because my pointer finger hurt so much. Not much I can do about it though. I finally packed the hospital bag, at least for the most part. I'm sure there are some things I've forgetten but at least I've got something in there.
Monday, August 16, 2010
On Saturday, my mom came over and helped me put together the PNP, swing and a book shelf. Thanks goodness she helped and we did it now because I am running out of gas. I don't know where people say they get a burst of energy at the end because I'm heading in the opposite direction. Tony got the garage in better shape but there is still more to do in there. We just need one car to fit right now, at this point, we can fit about a half a car.
Tony is so cute, I think he is trying to spend as much alone time with me as possible lately. He even came in and watched a chick flick with me on Saturday night with no complaints and I didn't even ask him to watch it. He just came in the living room and laid down on my lap and we watched the whole thing together. After it was over, I told him I was proud of him and he just said he watched it because he likes Kevin Klein movies. Uh huh, whatever you say. ;-) It's kinda sad but nice to see the change that has come over him in the last few weeks or months about all this. It's sad because we both realize that change is headed our way and we are both scared s**tless but we are coming together for it. But it's also neat to see him finally come to some sort of terms with it and I just know what a good dad he is gonna be. Whether he has faith in himself or not, I know he will be great. Between him, the cat and the dog, I'm feeling very loved in my house. I hope they all act this way when the baby gets here.
I've washed pretty much all the clothes and blankets etc. that I can. It took 4 loads but it's done. Pretty much I jsut need to pack the hospital bag now. I think I've been putting it off because I'm scared to pack it. I don't know. I really don't think this baby is coming until at least the end of next week but I just can't bring myself to pack that bag yet. Everyone is getting on me about it.
Baby has definitely dropped but it hasn't really eliviated any o f my issues. Acid reflux is still in high gear and now I have to pee even more. Tomorrow we get to see the baby one more time before he is an outside baby. Hopefully everything is going well and I've made some progress.
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
P.S. Yeah, I'm finally a watermelon. Aren't you excited mom?
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Right now I'm so miserable and focused on getting him out that I keep forgetting (not really) about what happens once he is here. We are gonna be parents! We are responsible for this little creature forever or at least 18 years. :-) I complain about the sleepless nights now but I know a different kind of sleepless night is coming. At this point though, I look forward to only napping for 3 months while I'm off work, at least in a few weeks I will physically feel better and I'll just be tired, not both at the same time. At least that's what I hope.
Sadie and Joy are still all in love with me. I wonder if Joy will change once the baby gets here. She really couldn't care less about me before I got pregnant, now she is in LOVE with me. She almost likes me more than Tony now. Sadie is just doing a good job of being my protector. Wherever I am, she is not far away. She even guards the doorway when I'm taking a bath. She is jealous of Joy being around me so much but nothing I can do about that. She has been more vocal lately, trying to talk to me I guess. I think they will both do well in their own little way with the baby but there will be a big transition for everybody once he gets here.
Tony is still scared to death of what is coming. He's never really failed at much in his life, so I dont' know why he thinks he will be bad at all this. I think he will be great (as long as he doesn't sleep through every night feeding and diaper change). He is instinctually good with kids but he doesn't think he is. Everyone else can see it though. He is a 34 yr old big kid and I think that will be good and help him in these early years. He is worried that his heart is only big enough to love me and I told him that his heart will make room for this baby. There is almost no way he couldn't love it. We made this baby together, out of love and that is what we will get in return from it. He is also afraid of not being #1 in my life but I told him that we just have to make sure we make time for each other. I'm scared that because he's a boy, maybe they will like each other better than me and I'll be the odd woman out down the road. I don't think Tony really thinks about all my fears of what's happening or gonna happen. I have a lot of fears too.
Friday, August 6, 2010
Hopefully getting some sun at the beach this weekend will give me a boost of energy and feeling good so I can get through these last few weeks.
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
He did an internal and says that baby is still way up there and no dialation. So I guess that means he gonna be in there for a while longer, which is good for him and not so good for me. Baby still needs to be in there for a little longer to grow but I am physically done. I'm trying not to be selfish or sound selfish about it but I am truly done with being pregnant. I'm finding it hard to think of anything positive about how I feel. I'm miserable and in pain everyday and I know most pregnant women feel this way by this point, but I just can't lie to myself anymore. I know I have no choice but to keep going, the baby will come when he's ready, but physically, I'm done and mentally it's taking it's toll on me too.
Word to the people, tell me I can do it, give me positive energy to get through these last few weeks because I need it.
I bought myself some jellybeans and Tagamet at lunch today. Hopefully they will both make me feel a little better.
Monday, August 2, 2010
That is my life now. Everything I do, revolves on a trip to the bathroom. I am now a tester of every department store, movie theater, restaurant etc. bathroom that I come across. I should have invested in Scott Tissue a few months ago because I now go throw a roll every couple of days, I pee so much. I can't wait to have my body back. I know it will be a different body but hopefully I will have some resemblance of normal again once I pop this kid out. I have no idea how long it will take to get back to normal since I've never done this before but I'm definitely looking forward to it.
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
For our last class we learned about c-sections and relaxation techniques. I don't know if I just missed the point on this or what but laying on the hard, disgusting floor, in the dark, listening to the teacher talk us through a relaxing, imaginary trip to the beach was not my idea of relaxing. I can't get comfortable in my own bed much less on the freaking hard floor! Maybe that was the point. To take yourself out of the uncomfortable position and imagine yourself somewhere else. If so, then give me a big fat F for fail. Not fun. Tony of course can fall asleep anywhere and someone started snoring. I don't know how they fell asleep but whatever.
Anyway, since we've taken the Lamaze, Breastfeeding, and Basic Infant Care classes, I guess we should know how to have a baby and take care of it once it's here. Uh huh! ;-) We learned some stuff but I think most of it will be on the job training. I think Tony needed some of it more than me but I guess I feel better knowing we've been told the correct and incorrect way to do some of this stuff.
P.S. The teacher said for recovery time I should not do any cooking, cleaning, laundry etc. for 2 weeks. She said a lot of people push themselves too hard too soon and it slows their recovery time. So take a couple of weeks off and then start adding things back to your normal routine. Needless to say, Tony was not too please with this advice. :-)
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
I'll just leave it at that. I'm sure that's too much info for some of you already, but this is my blog, so I'll right what I want. It's a pregnancy blog, what do you expect? ;-)
On another note, I can't wait until I no longer have to plan my day and night around bathroom breaks. This is getting stupid.
Last night of baby classes tonight. I'm so glad to be done. Too much time out of my days.
Thursday, July 22, 2010
We learned a few things but it also raised some more questions.
This class we learned what kind of drugs I want during labor. I thought there were only 2 types of epidurals but there are actually 4, at least at Winnie Palmer.
Traditional - used only in C-sections
Light - the normal one, where you can't move or feel anything from you chest down (have to stay in bed the whole time, need a catheter)
Walking - drugs take away sensation of pain but you can still move about and walk around with help to move things along (less intense, less drugs, might need to convert to "Light" to take away pain towards the end, which takes 30 minutes, can feel contractions and know when to push)
Super Walking - same as the "Walking" except it has more pain meds so you won't need to convert in the latter part of labor (jus tthe right amount of pain meds and mobility)
So I've decided I want the Super Walking epidural. I want to be able to move around and keep things goings and it kinda freaks me out to not be able to feel anything. The teacher said in 6 years, no one has needed more drugs after getting this kind of epidural. So this sounds good to me.
She also said the from the time you request the epidural, it takes about an hour from start to finish before you get the full affects of it. So I need to request it before I think I really need it so I have it when I do. I can also get some Stadol in the meantime to tide me over until then. I jsut hate being in pain so I'm trying to be proactive with this.
Tony had to do this exercise where he had to cause me pain so I could block it out with our breathing exercises that we learned. I think he enjoyed that a little too much. I have a bruise on my arm where he squeezed the crap out of it. She said to do this 5x a day until birth so we can learn to focus on something other than the pain. sorry lady, but I'm not putting myself in pain everyday UNTIL labor. Once was enough. I get the point but no thanks, that's what the epidural is for. I better get one.
Also, some of my fears about the epi were put to rest. I found out that Winnie Palmer delivers the 2nd most babies in the world. In the world!!! And that they have no incidence of paralysis from epidurals, which is a big fear of mine. Not that it couldn't happen but it makes me feel a little safer. So they must know what they are doing.
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Monday, July 19, 2010
Today is a pretty miserable day for me. After the wedding on Saturday and only getting about 4 hours of sleep last night, I'm dragging and miserable at work. I had to sit through a 2 hour harassment meeting today which was basically torture. I cannot see the light at the end of the tunnel yet. 6 weeks still seems like such a far off time. I told work August 31 will be my last day even if baby isn't here yet. I just know that physically my body will be done with sitting in this chair at work for 8 hours a day by then, probably before then, but I'm gonna try to stick it out.
Tony is starting to voice his fears more now. It's good that he is saying it out loud now. That way, more people can give him pep talks and advice. If he wasn't scared, then I'd be worried.
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
We also learned 2 breathing exercises. Tony has to do some hand signals and count as I breathe. Not sure I'll be doing those. I felt like I wasn't getting enough air, can't imagine doing them during labor.
Monday, July 12, 2010
Friday, July 9, 2010
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
I bought Tony some Nerds to have after we got home for going to class and not falling asleep. I'm the best wife ever. :-)
So now I've officially gained 21 pounds total. Not too bad so far. My goal is to not gain more than 30 so we will see.
My gestational diabetes test came back great. Normal is anything under 140 and mine was 103. The heartbeat sounded great and the baby is head down.
I asked him how far past my due date will they let me go before intervening and he said 1 week. So this baby is coming by Labor Day no matter what. Good to know. I dont' know how much longer I could go anyway.